I wrote this about a year ago for a prompt that was along the lines of “You’re a villain who’s incredibly lonely,” and I thought I’d share it here. - River
This is it. This is the one. For years, I’ve been trying to get the great “Rocket Man” to spend just a little time with me. I really thought I had him last time, with the whole “Stop me, or disarm the bombs around the city” thing. Man, he’s fast.
That’s what makes him so great, though. No matter what obstacles get in his way, he manages to save the day. He can do anything. Well, almost anything. But this time, I got him. Hoo boy, do I got him.
I turn. As slow as possible, for the full dramatic effect, and gaze at my trap. I could almost cry. Copper chains. His only weakness, as far as I know. He’s mentioned that he’s vulnerable to magic before, but that’s far out of my ability.
“How did you know?” he asks, struggling against the huge chains that bind his entire form. Each link weighs 10 pounds, and they’re all connected to the walls of my newest lair. I can take no chances. If this doesn’t work, I don’t know what I’d do.
“Oh, about your weakness to copper?” I say, putting emphasis on the last word, just like all good super villains do. “Well, I wasn’t sure at first. You’ve certainly never mentioned it. But I noticed you never carry pennies. It only took a few tests to realize I could contain you with the material.”
“What?” he says, staring at me with a mix of shock and confusion. He had stopped struggling. “What do you mean, I never carry pennies?”
Oh no. For a genius, I can be an idiot. He doesn’t know that I know who he is. One time, I attacked his place of work, but I managed to convince him it was just because they had printed a particularly rude piece about me. Oh, well. The damage is done.
“That’s right, Rocket Man,” I say, steepling my fingers, and flashing him my most wicked grin. “I know who you are under that mask. You have nowhere to run anymore.” I start to pace. I should probably get to it.
“Tell me, Rocket Man. Does copper drain your powers, or merely bring you down to a more manageable level?” I ask. This is important. If it makes him human, I could kill him. That’s not happening.
“You’ll have to do more than this if you want to get rid of me,” he says, resuming his attempts to break the chains. That’s good. That means we have plenty of time.
“I wouldn’t bother, Rocket Man. Save your energy for what comes next,” I say, striding over to my surveillance monitor, positioned so that he has nowhere else to look. As it turns on, I swiftly turn, sweeping my arm up toward the screen. “Look, Rocket Man! At what happens to those who get in my way!”
The screen shows several heroes, all clad in their brightly colored spandex, strewed across a large amount of rubble. In reality, paid actors pre-recorded at a construction site. The look on Rocket Man’s face tells me all I need to know. For my plan to truly work, he has to believe that only he can defeat me.
“No…” he says. It escapes him, like air escaping a tire.
“Oh yes,” I reply, nodding. “Bombnado, Glory Girl, and Uni-Lad. All of them, felled at my hands. It seems you’re the only one who can withstand my radioactive aura.”
“You…” he says, blinking back tears. I would feel bad for him, if my anticipation wasn’t so palpable.
“Oh, I’m sorry,” I say, goading him. I’m walking a thin line now. “They were your friends, weren’t they? Have a lot of fond memories of Bombnado, do you?”
“He was a damn good man. Better than you.” That hurt, but it wasn’t unexpected.
“And what did he do that was so great?” I ask. This was the key. Why had these people earned his favor? Over me? The most important figure in Rocket Man’s life?
“He dedicated his life to saving others. The entire world owes him a debt. You couldn’t begin to understand that.”
I couldn’t understand? Who has sacrificed more than I? I, who could turn entire cities to wasteland simply by being present? I, who could sicken even the healthiest of people with a touch? I walled myself away, to protect the fragile world around me, and instead of thanks, I got isolation.
“Very well,” I say, turning back to the monitor. The view changed the surrounding city. “It’s time, Rocket Man. My final, brilliant plan.” I pause. Then I turn back to my foe, still attempting to break through his binds. “In mere moments, I will bathe the city in enough radiation to turn it to dust. And then I will stand atop the ashes, as king of the wasteland.”
I don’t like to see him like this. Desperately trying to stop me. I want to tell him that it’s just pretend. I don’t want to hurt anyone. I never planned on keeping him forever. In a few moments, I’ll hit a button, he’ll “break free”, and our dance will begin anew. But please, Rocket Man. Give me this moment.
“How did you spend your last day on Earth, Rocket Man?” I say, striding toward him. This is how he’s defeated me before. If he keeps me talking, it gives him enough time to figure a way out of here.
“You said you know who I am, right?” he asks, pausing his struggle. He’s breathing heavily, which is unusual for him. The copper must be working better than I thought.
“That’s right. Terrance McDowell. Never pictured you for a Terrance, honestly.”
“Then you know where I work.”
“Yes, of course, the Waterfront Journal.” I want him to be able to talk freely. If he thinks he has something he can hide, he will.
“I… I went to work this morning. Got a bagel on my way there. I’ve been moved to the sports column, so I was working on an article about last night’s game,” he says. I wonder why he was moved to the sports column.
“I didn’t realize the Rocket Man was a sports fan.”
“I catch a game every now and then. They moved me as punishment for my constant tardiness,” he says. That would probably be largely my fault. I’ll have to schedule these meets better. That might be enough for the day. I don’t want to push my luck with these copper chains. If all goes well, we’ll talk for greater lengths next time.
“I believe it’s time, Rocket Man. Would you like a countdown? I know how much you heroes like your countdowns,” I say, striding back toward the monitor.
“No! Please!” He’s screaming now, pulling against the chains with all his might. I have to collect myself before I can speak again.
“You’ve lost, Rocket Man. At least die with some dignity,” I say, still looking at my monitor. I can’t look back at him.
“Just kill me instead! Leave the city alone!” This is typical of him. Always putting others before himself.
“Please,” he screams, “I want to die!”
I pause.
That was very much unlike him. I was just about to hit the button on my gauntlet, but this development has left me frozen. I turn to him.
“What did you say?”
He looks up at me. There’s a weariness there that I haven’t seen before.
“I want to die,” he says. “I can’t do this anymore. I’m not safe to be around. My powers… something about them, it makes those around me sick. I’m a disease.” No. This is not good.
“Sick how?” I ask. I have a feeling I know the answer.
“My wife has cancer. Many of my coworkers are developing signs, or other problems. Even some of the other heroes have been afflicted.”
NO! NO NO NO! He think’s HE’S making them sick, when it’s actually me! I’m an idiot! His prolonged exposure to me might be harmless to him, but the radioactive trace I leave on him is sure to affect those around him! But what do I do? He seems so defeated now. He’s given up on the chains once again. To let him out now could risk him realizing my ruse. There’s only one way to play this.
“HA!” I laugh. “HA HA HA HA HA!” I keep laughing. I act as though this is the funniest thing I’ve ever heard. While I’m bent over, I hit the release button on my gauntlet, causing links in the chains to split open. Rocket Man notices this and, summoning his last ounce of strength, rips the links off, causing the lengths of chain binding him to fall to the ground. Before I know it, he’s on me.
He grips me by the collar. The look in his eyes is one I’ve never seen before.
“You think this is funny?” he asks.
“Now you know how I feel,” I say. This gives him pause. But not much.
“You’re going to jail, Geiger. A special cell, guarded against your radiation.” This is not the first time I’ve been put in this cell. His optimism is endearing, though.
I’ve decided to stay in jail for a while. At least until the last trace of our encounter has dissipated. I’ve had material sent along to the doctors at Mrs. McDowell’s hospital. I expect I’ve done more research on radiation poisoning than anyone else in the world. I’m confident that Rocket Man’s wife will pull through.
He still visits me. He says he has people working on a cure for me. Which is nice. I think this whole experience has opened his eyes to my pain, which is more than any of his other villains can say.
I don’t intend to tell him that I break out of my cell every once in a while to disrupt their research. A cure would be nice, yes, but then I would be normal. And why on earth would Rocket Man pay attention to a normal person?
No, I think I’ll stay this way.
For my best friend.